Party Products: Those Fancy Masks They Wear In Romeo And Juliet?

The best party products in the world for me wouldn’t be balloons, poppers or copious amounts of booze, thought the latter is always welcome.

No, the best party products would be those masks they wear in Romeo and Juliet, because I think I’ve got Prosopagnosia.

Yeah, you know, Prosopagnosia? I think there’s something up with my fusiform gyrus because I have real trouble recognising people’s faces.

People’s other erm, bits, don’t cause a problem, especially their hair, I always seem to notice that, so by default my problem is at its worst with bald, middle-aged men. They all merge into one. Thankfully, I don’t frequent parties where the main demographic in attendance is bald, middle-aged men, but if I did my world would be a confusing place for the night.

Not that there’s anything wrong with bald men. I don’t consider myself baldist. It’s just that a room full of the follically-challenged may as well be a fridge shelf full of eggs in terms of my being capable of identifying individuals.

Grant Mitchell

Bruce Willis

And not being able to tell people apart at parties can cause all kinds of problems.